(rant)
Some may know, and some may not.
I've made quite a big decision in my life and it involves letting go of someone important to me.
For the past week or days, lying down on my bed and closing my eyes have been a nightmare.
i cant identify exactly why or what i am thinking, which is pretty bad.
i dont think letting go is hard itself.
i believe the decision to let go is the difficult part about this whole moving on thing.
it might be because ive always been the kind to stick to my decisions once the decision has been made though i take forever to make that one decision.
all the blabber about letting go isnt hard blah blah blah, but i do think moving on is hard.
like everyone says, the flashbacks are the worst.
all the good times, all the hard times that had been successfully overcome.
nevertheless, some good memories become the launch pad of some negative thoughts, such as what im about to write
i dont like or may i say hate, people who dont cherish people or things.
i might be or possibly will be guilty of not treasuring certain things or experiences.
but to people, especially those that are important to me, i doubt so and let's skip all those bitches who try to bring me down, though i thank them for making me strong lmao.
back to the point.
i hate it when people change and become all nice when a person gets fed up or pissed off.
like why cant you do it in the first place like whuttt.
i know when two people fight, one has to change so as to beg for forgiveness or whatever they are changing for, but isnt that like changing your principle?!
mending ways are something else and apologizing for losing your temper and committing some fucking murder are different things.
like if you insist on doing something that way and then pisses somebody off and decides to change your way of doing it just so that one person can not be angry anymore, shows some idiocy in your thinking.
first, being fickle minded. second, being that absolute ass for changing just when the person blows.
third, for taking the easy way.
changing for the better is always good though, i respect those who turn over a new leaf :-)
and call me a weirdo, i hate it when people cry.
i will definitely can more mad when a person tries to use pity to win over me.
like you are not as cute as that puppy, hello it wont work.
maybe im overly suspicious too and think that everyone acts well enough to cry when they want to.
to end this post off,
i hope i'll become happier as a whole and live life for myself.
the year of the horse has begun and it marks a brand new year,
i wish my readers or reader :-( , a happy chinese new year!
快乐最重要 !!!!!!!!